- DO – keep up your dates! I often get asked the question, “What should our dates look like?” This is completely up to you and your partner. It can be a day date, night date, weekend, or weekday date! Making sure that you and your significant other are investing in the importance of dates can go very far in the life and mood of your relationship. Dates provide a shared bonding experience, foster commitment to each other, add excitement, and promote communication and emotional connection.
- DO – continue to nurture sexual intimacy in your relationship. This can be a sensitive area so take baby steps. A good place to start may be to identify one thing your partner already does for you sexually that you enjoy, and ask for more of it. Fostering sexual communication sets the tone and gives direction to your partner of what you value in your sexual relationship.
- DO – monthly “business meetings”. Let’s face it, there is nothing sexy about paying a mortgage, phone bill, or budgeting but it is a necessity in relationships. These meetings will provide you and your partner time to create a budget, plan for your financial future, and just simply be on the same page. Working through and towards a shared goal can foster and encourage you and your partner to feel like you are on the same team. Ever heard “don’t mix business with pleasure”? The same applies here. This should be separate from the date activities.
- DO – continue to work on communication with your partner. Whether you are in a long term relationship or married, learning about your partner is an on-going process. Often times, couples argue because they assume they know their partner well enough to know what their intention is when they speak. It is important to avoid interpretation. Instead ask and clarify the meaning of their behavior or message. Check your perceptions!
- DO – invest in “me time”. I cannot stress enough how important “me time” is for you as an individual, but also for the mood of your relationship. At least 10 minutes of “me time” daily can go a long way. What does “me time” look like? It can be anything that allows you to de-stress from your day such as writing in your journal, listening to your favorite music, taking a bath, or indulging in your favorite aroma therapy scent! Spending time investing in yourself and elevating your mood allows you to change your mind set when approaching your partner after a long day.
Whether you are in a long term relationship, engaged, or married, focusing on these five key areas in your relationship can help create and continue to maintain the foundation.